I admire tattoo artists – any artist, but more so a tattoo artist. Their art is permanent and they really need to know their stuff because it is prominently displayed on a person’s body…. and a tattoo artist’s reputation is based on the result. It’s not so much word of mouth, but by sight.
BUT I wouldn’t like one of my sons to have a tattoo. Call me prudish, but like a good friend of mines says, when I gave birth to those little bodies they were covered in beautiful silky soft skin without blemish. And that is the way I want them to stay. Sure along the way they have gained scars from bicycle accidents, rugby and hockey mishaps etc. but those scars give character and provide tales to tell their children one day. A tattoo is a conscious act. What bugs me the most is what seems important to have tattooed on your body now, may not be important or even relevant 20 or 30 years down the road. Names of girlfriends who never turn into wives come to mind.
Divan wants a tattoo. I have changed the subject, voiced my concern, ignored him flat out – but to no avail. Eventually last night I decided to let him tell me exactly why he wanted a tattoo and what he wanted tattooed onto his perfect body.
“I want Ouma Helen’s name, her beginning date and her end date. I want it tattooed on my chest because I miss her”
My heart aches for him, but I’m just wondering whether he will look like a wall of rememberance by the age of 30 when his other grandparents have passed away and he misses them too?
Goldfish with Fin
Sharks in my Fish Tank
Thursday, May 24, 2012
Thursday, May 3, 2012
Giving our children to God
I have been walking around with a heavy heart for a few days now, worrying about my sons. I confess, it is my favourite pastime. Am I doing enough for them, are they ok, do they need anything. They think I'm naive, but I know when they are going through difficult times. I know them as if I made them myself.
At times I am overcome with anxiety about choices they make. They seem to steer in the opposite direction to the advice I have given them.
I subscribed to a daily devotional a while ago - Girlfriends in God. I was waiting in anticipation for it to appear in my inbox this morning - just needed something to let me know I'm on the right track, or off it..... This is the message I got....
May 3, 2012
Giving our Children to God
Sharon Jaynes
Today’s Truth:
“Everything is possible for him who believes,” (Mark 9:23 NIV).
Friend to Friend
Once a distraught father had an unruly son with multiple physical and emotional problems. Many people even said the boy was possessed by a demon. The dad had tried everything, but the boy continued to demonstrate antisocial behavior by throwing himself in fire and then in water. That sort of behavior, on top of frequent seizures, rolling on the ground, foaming at the mouth, and an inability to talk, made the dad desperate to find a solution. He even took the boy to some faith healers who were traveling through his hometown. But nothing seemed to work.
Finally, the dad realized no human being was going to be able to help his son, so he took him directly to God. The father heard that Jesus was visiting in his community, so he boldly brought the boy to Him. With desperation in his voice the father pleaded, “If You can do anything, take pity on us and help us!”
And Jesus answered, “If You can! All things are possible to him who believes.”
Immediately the boy’s father cried out, “I do believe: help my unbelief.”
With that profession, Jesus healed the man’s son.
Oh how this story from Mark 9 stirs my heart. Can’t you feel the father’s pain? How desperately he must have felt every time the child threw himself into the water or the fire. “Why son? Why do you do these things? I don’t understand,” he must have asked.
Imagine the humiliation of the whispers as the family walked down the streets. “That’s the Jones family. Have you heard about their son? He’s…..” The stares. The snickers. The off-color comments. Don’t you know there were many days when this dad wanted to just give up? Instead, he offers us a beautiful picture of what all parents must do, the ultimate act in parenting - hand our children over to God.
As mothers, aunts, grandmothers, and a host of other caretakers, at times we find ourselves at the end of our mental and emotional resources. We feel we have done everything humanly possible and don’t know the best action to take with our children. That’s exactly where God wants us every day, not depending on our human capabilities but on His unlimited abilities, not depending on our own impotence but on His potent power, not depending on our limited knowledge but on His unlimited wisdom. When we realize that we do not have and never will have all the child-rearing answers, we can find peace in giving our children to the One who does.
S.D. Gordon, in Quiet Talks on Prayer, said, “You can do more than pray, after you have prayed. But you cannot do more than pray until you have prayed.”
Let’s Pray
(For those who have children still at home)
Dear God, today, I once again bring my child to you. Please show me how to parent this precious gift that you have given me. Help me to be the best mother (or caregiver) that I can be. I pray that Your Holy Spirit will teach me, Your wisdom will guide me, and Your love will move me. Most of all, Lord, I give this child to You. Please make him (her) a child after Your own heart.
In Jesus’ Name,
Amen.
(For those with grown children)
Dear God, my child is no longer under my roof or under my wing. He (She) is now out in the world making life decisions of his (her) own. I give this adult child to You, Lord. May he (she) seek You with all his (her) heart. I pray that You will protect him (her), guide him (her), and open his (her) heart to the truth of God’s Word every day. I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth (3 John 4 NIV).
In Jesus’ Name,
Amen.
Now It’s Your Turn
Make a list of things about your child over which you have no control.
Now turn that list into a prayer and relinquish each item of concern to God.
Remember Jesus’ reply to the father who said, “If you can do anything…” Write today’s key verse on an index card and commit it to memory.
At times I am overcome with anxiety about choices they make. They seem to steer in the opposite direction to the advice I have given them.
I subscribed to a daily devotional a while ago - Girlfriends in God. I was waiting in anticipation for it to appear in my inbox this morning - just needed something to let me know I'm on the right track, or off it..... This is the message I got....
May 3, 2012
Giving our Children to God
Sharon Jaynes
Today’s Truth:
“Everything is possible for him who believes,” (Mark 9:23 NIV).
Friend to Friend
Once a distraught father had an unruly son with multiple physical and emotional problems. Many people even said the boy was possessed by a demon. The dad had tried everything, but the boy continued to demonstrate antisocial behavior by throwing himself in fire and then in water. That sort of behavior, on top of frequent seizures, rolling on the ground, foaming at the mouth, and an inability to talk, made the dad desperate to find a solution. He even took the boy to some faith healers who were traveling through his hometown. But nothing seemed to work.
Finally, the dad realized no human being was going to be able to help his son, so he took him directly to God. The father heard that Jesus was visiting in his community, so he boldly brought the boy to Him. With desperation in his voice the father pleaded, “If You can do anything, take pity on us and help us!”
And Jesus answered, “If You can! All things are possible to him who believes.”
Immediately the boy’s father cried out, “I do believe: help my unbelief.”
With that profession, Jesus healed the man’s son.
Oh how this story from Mark 9 stirs my heart. Can’t you feel the father’s pain? How desperately he must have felt every time the child threw himself into the water or the fire. “Why son? Why do you do these things? I don’t understand,” he must have asked.
Imagine the humiliation of the whispers as the family walked down the streets. “That’s the Jones family. Have you heard about their son? He’s…..” The stares. The snickers. The off-color comments. Don’t you know there were many days when this dad wanted to just give up? Instead, he offers us a beautiful picture of what all parents must do, the ultimate act in parenting - hand our children over to God.
As mothers, aunts, grandmothers, and a host of other caretakers, at times we find ourselves at the end of our mental and emotional resources. We feel we have done everything humanly possible and don’t know the best action to take with our children. That’s exactly where God wants us every day, not depending on our human capabilities but on His unlimited abilities, not depending on our own impotence but on His potent power, not depending on our limited knowledge but on His unlimited wisdom. When we realize that we do not have and never will have all the child-rearing answers, we can find peace in giving our children to the One who does.
S.D. Gordon, in Quiet Talks on Prayer, said, “You can do more than pray, after you have prayed. But you cannot do more than pray until you have prayed.”
Let’s Pray
(For those who have children still at home)
Dear God, today, I once again bring my child to you. Please show me how to parent this precious gift that you have given me. Help me to be the best mother (or caregiver) that I can be. I pray that Your Holy Spirit will teach me, Your wisdom will guide me, and Your love will move me. Most of all, Lord, I give this child to You. Please make him (her) a child after Your own heart.
In Jesus’ Name,
Amen.
(For those with grown children)
Dear God, my child is no longer under my roof or under my wing. He (She) is now out in the world making life decisions of his (her) own. I give this adult child to You, Lord. May he (she) seek You with all his (her) heart. I pray that You will protect him (her), guide him (her), and open his (her) heart to the truth of God’s Word every day. I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth (3 John 4 NIV).
In Jesus’ Name,
Amen.
Now It’s Your Turn
Make a list of things about your child over which you have no control.
Now turn that list into a prayer and relinquish each item of concern to God.
Remember Jesus’ reply to the father who said, “If you can do anything…” Write today’s key verse on an index card and commit it to memory.
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Goosebumps....
On Monday my day was completely out of sorts..... At work I had unforseen deadlines and had to work an extra hour to finish, I had to pick Divan up from hockey practice which ended 1/2 an hour later than expected. Dylan had to be fetched from the house where he would be house sitting which is right on the other side of where I had to fetch Divan from - in peak hour traffic on Malibongwe drive.
Needless to say, we only arrived home at 18h30. Luckily my wonderful husband had already cooked the macaroni and fried the bacon for the evenings supper of macaroni and cheese. I only had to make the cheese sauce and put everything together. I must be honest and say that I did not have the energy to do anything special, and was about to make a slap dash white sauce when I realised that my men were starving and they deserved nothing less than my best - even if it was only going to be macaroni and cheese.
I melted the butter and added the flour, then the milk bit by bit and whisked up a frenzy to ensure that there were no lumps. Then added the salt and freshly ground black pepper with a dash of paprika and lots and lots of cheese. Waited for it to thicken then added the fried bacon and poured everything over the macaroni. Stirred it together and dished up.
The boys were absolutely famished and started eating straight away. Dylan took his first bite, then another and looked at me: "Mom, this is so good." He pushed up his jersey sleeve and showed me. "Look, I've got goosebumps!!"
That's the best compliment I have EVER had about my food!
Needless to say, we only arrived home at 18h30. Luckily my wonderful husband had already cooked the macaroni and fried the bacon for the evenings supper of macaroni and cheese. I only had to make the cheese sauce and put everything together. I must be honest and say that I did not have the energy to do anything special, and was about to make a slap dash white sauce when I realised that my men were starving and they deserved nothing less than my best - even if it was only going to be macaroni and cheese.
I melted the butter and added the flour, then the milk bit by bit and whisked up a frenzy to ensure that there were no lumps. Then added the salt and freshly ground black pepper with a dash of paprika and lots and lots of cheese. Waited for it to thicken then added the fried bacon and poured everything over the macaroni. Stirred it together and dished up.
The boys were absolutely famished and started eating straight away. Dylan took his first bite, then another and looked at me: "Mom, this is so good." He pushed up his jersey sleeve and showed me. "Look, I've got goosebumps!!"
That's the best compliment I have EVER had about my food!
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Be strong...
I really missed my mother in law this past weekend - not only because it was Easter weekend and I just know she would have invited us for lunch on Sunday serving chicken and mushroom pie, beans and potatoes mashed with lots of pepper, sweet pumpkin and sticky rice. (I can smell the different aromas that used to tantalise my nose when I opened the front door to her home.) I also missed her because I needed her. I needed her wisdom and her encouragement. I needed her to tell me (yet again) that things aren't always as bad as they seem.
When the boys were younger, I felt 'big'. I felt half in control, that everything can be dealt with by using good organisational skills and a 'to do' list. Then as they started getting older, I started feeling smaller, half out of control..... Ma Helen had 4 boys and always seemed in control. Nothing got her down.
Now my boys tower above me in stature and in personality and I must say that I sometimes feel overwhelmed. I don't know how to deal with many of the situations that are sent my way. Organisational skills and to do lists don't work anymore..... I have to rely on the foundation I gave them when they were still small and I was 'tall'.
I needed Ma Helen this weekend to say "You think that things are all topsy turvey because you are seeing it through your eyes, but God is looking at the situation through His eyes, and everything is on track." He dreamt about each of my sons before they were born. He has a plan for each one of them, and I must have faith in Him. And when things get really tough? "Be strong. God has promised He will never let you go through more than you can handle."
When the boys were younger, I felt 'big'. I felt half in control, that everything can be dealt with by using good organisational skills and a 'to do' list. Then as they started getting older, I started feeling smaller, half out of control..... Ma Helen had 4 boys and always seemed in control. Nothing got her down.
Now my boys tower above me in stature and in personality and I must say that I sometimes feel overwhelmed. I don't know how to deal with many of the situations that are sent my way. Organisational skills and to do lists don't work anymore..... I have to rely on the foundation I gave them when they were still small and I was 'tall'.
I needed Ma Helen this weekend to say "You think that things are all topsy turvey because you are seeing it through your eyes, but God is looking at the situation through His eyes, and everything is on track." He dreamt about each of my sons before they were born. He has a plan for each one of them, and I must have faith in Him. And when things get really tough? "Be strong. God has promised He will never let you go through more than you can handle."
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
When a craft turns into harmful intent
One of the useful things about having a 'smart' phone is that I can surf the internet while I'm waiting to pick up kids, in a queue at Pick 'n Pay etc. And I can bookmark them.... which makes it easier to find them again. It's also great when the boys need to look up something on the internet as we don't have a computer at home.
So it came about that Dylan wanted to check something and asked if he could borrow my phone. Sure thing.... I was sitting at the dining room table and looked up to watch something on the television. My eyes drifted over to Dylan and I could see this intense look on his face. Then he frowned deeply, tilted his head and looked at me.
"Why would you want to make a Roman blind?"
"It's to hang in my kitchen"
The look intensified........
and then I clicked.....
"Dylan, it's not a real Roman person........ it's a window dressing."
"Ooohhhh" Relief.
He had seen by bookmark on "How to make a Roman blind."
So it came about that Dylan wanted to check something and asked if he could borrow my phone. Sure thing.... I was sitting at the dining room table and looked up to watch something on the television. My eyes drifted over to Dylan and I could see this intense look on his face. Then he frowned deeply, tilted his head and looked at me.
"Why would you want to make a Roman blind?"
"It's to hang in my kitchen"
The look intensified........
and then I clicked.....
"Dylan, it's not a real Roman person........ it's a window dressing."
"Ooohhhh" Relief.
He had seen by bookmark on "How to make a Roman blind."
Friday, February 24, 2012
Sounding strange?
I don't usually take my cellphone into the bathroom with me, firstly because I hate being interupted in the one place where I can be alone with my thoughts, soaking in a hot tub with bubble bath, secondly because when some-one phones they KNOW you are in the bathroom by the echo.....
But this one afternoon I decided to take my phone with me for the reason that no-one else was home and I wasn't quite sure whether Dylan had a lift home or not.
And, as luck would have it, 5 minutes into my luxurious bath time experience, the phone rings..... grab a towel, dry hands, save the towel before it falls into the bath, grab the phone, grab the glasses (can't see the green button without them...) answer the phone - and it is, in fact, Dylan...
"Hallo"
"Hallo, Mom?"
"Hi Dylan...."
"Mom?"
"Yes Dylan, what's wrong?"
"Mom can you hear me?"
"Yes Dylan, speak....." (I am dripping foam and freezing from the breeze coming in through the window)
"Mom? Ok, I have a lift home"
"Great, Dylan, where are you now?" (I need to know whether I must finish my bath quickly so that I can unlock the front door for him, or can I spend an extra 20 minutes relaxing).
"Can't hear you, what are you saying Mom?"
"Wheeerrreeee aaaaarrreeeee yoooouuuuu?"
"Whaaaaat?"
"Where are you!!!!!
"Mom, send me an sms, bye!"
So I duly send him an sms "Where are you"
"Leaving work now...... why do you sound vacuum packed?"
But this one afternoon I decided to take my phone with me for the reason that no-one else was home and I wasn't quite sure whether Dylan had a lift home or not.
And, as luck would have it, 5 minutes into my luxurious bath time experience, the phone rings..... grab a towel, dry hands, save the towel before it falls into the bath, grab the phone, grab the glasses (can't see the green button without them...) answer the phone - and it is, in fact, Dylan...
"Hallo"
"Hallo, Mom?"
"Hi Dylan...."
"Mom?"
"Yes Dylan, what's wrong?"
"Mom can you hear me?"
"Yes Dylan, speak....." (I am dripping foam and freezing from the breeze coming in through the window)
"Mom? Ok, I have a lift home"
"Great, Dylan, where are you now?" (I need to know whether I must finish my bath quickly so that I can unlock the front door for him, or can I spend an extra 20 minutes relaxing).
"Can't hear you, what are you saying Mom?"
"Wheeerrreeee aaaaarrreeeee yoooouuuuu?"
"Whaaaaat?"
"Where are you!!!!!
"Mom, send me an sms, bye!"
So I duly send him an sms "Where are you"
"Leaving work now...... why do you sound vacuum packed?"
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Living in Denial
I spent the evening on the laptop surfing the net and checking out the UNISA website for the course that Dylan wants to study. I'd like to disagree with anyone who thinks that this is a user friendly site..... Page after page of useless information and the search function takes you back to Google (?).
Dylan sits patiently at my side until we eventually find the degree that he fancies. But looking through the selection of degrees and diplomas I start to feel that maybe I'd like to study something too. That would really boost my self confidence.
Dylan sits attentively at my side - "What would you like to study?" Dylan asks.
"I don't know...." I respond.
"What about Psychology? All old people study psychology." he says while typing away on his phone.
"I'm not old!" I say.
There were a few minutes of silence before he says: "Well, people in denial also study psychology......."
Dylan sits patiently at my side until we eventually find the degree that he fancies. But looking through the selection of degrees and diplomas I start to feel that maybe I'd like to study something too. That would really boost my self confidence.
Dylan sits attentively at my side - "What would you like to study?" Dylan asks.
"I don't know...." I respond.
"What about Psychology? All old people study psychology." he says while typing away on his phone.
"I'm not old!" I say.
There were a few minutes of silence before he says: "Well, people in denial also study psychology......."
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)